I Know Why I’m Here
I walked into my apartment then realized I had been smiling since I stepped out of my vehicle. The road to this point has been full of trials, but I am reminded of how much it took for me to reach this place. The tears on my face meant something completely different in this moment. All of the time I spent feeling overwhelmed, every moment of disappointment, each time I could not stop beating myself up for losing everything — it all brought me here. As much as I’d still like to change every bit of it, this isn’t the end.
When you’re going through difficult times, you’ll hear all kinds of proverbial phrases:
Trouble doesn’t last always.
There is purpose in every storm.
There is light at the end of the tunnel.
There is no testimony without a test.
God gives his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers.
The list goes on…
As much as we might not want to hear the advice during difficult times, these phrases sum it all up.
I remember the tears I shed in the parking lot of Whole Foods and wondering how my life could possibly turn so far left. I recall pacing back and forth for hours in the backyard and trying to rationalize the agony I felt. I remember kneeling for hours in prayer several months ago and wondering how I could ever reach the place I am right now. I vividly recall what I felt like. On the other end of the spectrum, I recognize how grateful I should be.
I am grateful for the support I received from the person who loved me like I thought nobody ever could. I am grateful for every phone call or dinner with family and friends. I am grateful for the mentors I have found and the connections I have made. I am grateful for every ounce of support I have received as I battled through the most difficult period of my life. It hasn’t been easy, but trouble doesn’t last always. There is purpose in every storm. There is no testimony without the test and God sure does know how to build your faith during the moments it is hard to see the light.
This journey is not finished. The job is not done. There are many levels remaining for me to see and I understand that more now than I ever have. I am not the same person I was before. I can’t be. I see the world completely different now.
They might not sound exactly like mine, but everybody has a story.
This is a small part of the work, but I know why I’m here.
The Season Premiere of It’s Gonna Hurt, But It Won’t Kill You will be on July 15.
Be sure to tune in: https://youtu.be/sk5kE2dO14c
As always, remember . . . It’s gonna hurt, but it won’t kill you.
-TK
